Do you make New Year’s resolutions? I have mixed feelings, since, despite decades of resolving not to, I still bite my nails. But I also like the idea of adding fun things, like “always carry a book in your bag” or “send your best friend flowers to celebrate her achievements.” Here are six I’m hoping to do in 2022…
1. Work vocab words into everyday conversation. The other day, my mom was hanging out on the sofa telling a story, when she suddenly busted out the word “concatenation.” Record scratch, what? It’s weirdly exciting to find words that fit exactly what you want to say — like “soporific” and “postprandial” — and to use big words with little kids.
2. Walk 10,000 steps a day. Last year, I did a walking challenge with some friends where we did 12,000 steps a day for a few weeks. It felt so good. Like, crazy, wildly good. And I’m not a person who generally loves exercise. But stretching your legs, feeling fresh air on your skin, and laughing along to a podcast is the best pick-me-up. I’m going to shoot for 10,000 steps a day this year and see how it goes.
3. Spend some one-on-one time with the boys. When Anton was a newborn, I took Toby on dates, but we haven’t done that in ages. I’d love to spend more solo time with them, even if it’s just making hot chocolate at home or staring at the ceiling.
4. Get a dozen new pairs of black underwear. It makes mornings so much easier! On that note, one of the nicest things I did recently was get a new pillow. It’s one of those items that’s so rarely replaced, but you spend 1/3 of your day cuddling your face against it. I love this one and this one, fwiw.
5. Stop reading a book halfway through, if it’s not clicking. There are so many books out there! (Here are a few we’ve loved, if you’d like recommendations.)
6. Ease up. In my thirties, I was so anxious, and I still am, to be sure, but as I’ve gotten older, I just… don’t care as much? (Also, anti-anxiety medication has changed my life, but more on that later.) I’ve heard other women say the same thing, and maybe it’s a matter of seeing how time passes — for example, if something is not great now, it will change later; if someone is randomly grouchy to you, they’re probably just having a hard day, so try to feel empathy (‘We should send them a fruit basket,’ joked my friend Nora, when someone was snippy over the phone); when I worry about my kids (are they eating enough greens? should we be doing allowance?), I reassure myself that they know they are loved and that’s what matters. I’m still very much figuring things out along the way, but somehow the passage of time has shown me that these ups and downs are constant, so we can just ride the wave.
Will you be making resolutions? Please share below, I’d love to hear! In the past, a reader named Alice said, “To listen. More carefully, thoughtfully and actively.” Alexandra said: “Always ask before taking fries off my boyfriend’s plate.” And Kelly’s? “Embrace who I really am.”
P.S. Wise words, and how to be present.